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I'm celebrating the return of my cable access (It was down for over 12 hours! Quel horreur!) by reading stories at ff.n. How I love them! And I came across what is probably the best malapropism I have ever seen.

It's from a tenipuri fic, where Momoshiro (spelled "Momoshi") has been tasked to find a (female) date for Horio. Quite cute, really. But there seems to be a developing MomoKai side story. For reasons best known to the author, Kaidoh has moved in with Momo while both sets of their parents are on vacation.

Momo has just come downstairs, making a lot of noise tromping.

“Oye, you’re up already,” said Momo. Found a neatly stacked of blankets on the couch.

“I don’t think anyone could go back to sleep after all that rapture upstairs.” replied [Kaidoh].

Ah, young love.

Stargate Fic: Pushing Buttons (Harry/Jack)

Request ficlet the sixth, for wisdomeagle who asked for "Jack and Harry accidentally save the world, then have sex that hurts Jack's knees and breaks Harry's heart." R, 400 words.

Pushing Buttons

( button, button, who's got the button... )

Bruno & Boots Fic: All Quiet At Macdonald Hall

Request ficlet the seventh, for biichan who asked for Bruno and Boots, "The sanctity of Macdonald Hall is threatened." 800 words, G.

All Quiet At Macdonald Hall

( Boots's world is crumbling around him. )

A little help, eh?

If you're not Canadian, what do you call a tuque? Does anybody wear them outside of North America?

I was all set to write about Kaidoh wearing a tuque in the winter and then I realised that might not quite work. :) Any suggestions?