Entry tags:
uncharacteristically
I posted earlier (if cryptically) about the work stress I'm experiencing right now. It's just getting worse and I've come to the realization that I have to start implementing an escape plan ASAP.
God, I hate this. I hate the thought of spending my weekend working on my résumé and my website and my contacts. (Especially when I want to spend it writing fic and reading books.) I hate that the Best Job Ever is now something I have to flee, not because the job itself sucks, but because the company is going under.
And I hate that things are going to change. I don't like change.
I'm in the position right now where I could either find a new job -- and I think I should be able to, at least I hope so -- or try to make a go of it with contract work. I'm a web developer/programmer and so it's the kind of thing that's easy to do from home, if you can get the work in.
I don't have kids or a mortgage and I've already paid off my student loans. I have a long-term partner who is employed. We're not going to starve or even have to cut off our cable internet. It's not the end of the world.
But that doesn't mean I don't hate it.
I need a pint of stout and a sappy InuKai.
God, I hate this. I hate the thought of spending my weekend working on my résumé and my website and my contacts. (Especially when I want to spend it writing fic and reading books.) I hate that the Best Job Ever is now something I have to flee, not because the job itself sucks, but because the company is going under.
And I hate that things are going to change. I don't like change.
I'm in the position right now where I could either find a new job -- and I think I should be able to, at least I hope so -- or try to make a go of it with contract work. I'm a web developer/programmer and so it's the kind of thing that's easy to do from home, if you can get the work in.
I don't have kids or a mortgage and I've already paid off my student loans. I have a long-term partner who is employed. We're not going to starve or even have to cut off our cable internet. It's not the end of the world.
But that doesn't mean I don't hate it.
I need a pint of stout and a sappy InuKai.
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You've heard me say it before, but I'm so sorry it's come to this. You will absolutely be better off once you're out of there, though.
Change is hard, but you're going to make it just fine.
Holler if you need anything.
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I'm not discouraged yet, just ... sad and somewhat resentful.
Thanks for being there. It helps so much.
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Love you.
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Poor darling.
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Job hunting is a pain the arse. I hope you find something you enjoy quickly and with as little hassle as possible.
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Have something nice to drink and watch the sci-fi channel. That always makes me feel better. ♥
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I usually spend Friday nights watching whatever crappy TV I want, instead of doing something useful, so I think that will be good therapy. Though since the Lost Weekend of Joey/Chandler, I've been trying to cut down on the sitcoms.
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Inui sat at the breakfast table and read the help wanted section for the third time that morning.
It was incomprehensible. That he should be laid off (let go, dropped, sent packing) seemed incomprehensible. That he should be six weeks without a job was inconceivable. That he should have only been contacted for two interviews in the duration was unfathomable.
And yet, it was all undeniable.
The help wanted section for the day was tiny. He had carefully circled the two jobs that may be acceptable in bright green and had memorized them dutifully. After Kaidoh left for his daily training, Inui would turn on his computer, print out his resumes, and make a trip to the post office. Then, after returning to the apartment, he would get on the phone and call. And call. And call. Countless smooth voices would tell him that yes, the resume was received and yes, they had his number and yes, they wouldn't hesitate to contact him. It was a song and dance that resulted in wasted time and Inui was becoming rapidly frustrated with the pointless...
A pair of arms embraced him from behind, interrupting his thought processes. One continued down to curl around his waist as the other gently pushed the newspaper out of Inui's hand and onto the table. A pair of warm lips pressed to the side of his neck and Inui's thought processes were promptly derailed from exasperation to pleasure.
"You worry too much," Kaidoh murmured into Inui's ear, the arm around the waist tightening and the other wandering to ultimately rest at Inui's collarbone.
"Ah. You think so?" Inui's voice hitched on the last syllable as Kaidoh bit gently on his earlobe.
"Of course. Job-hunting takes time, Sadaharu. It's only been six weeks." The younger man continued his lazy exploration of Inui's ear with his tongue. "Patience."
"Six weeks is too lo-" The hand at his collarbone abruptly turned Inui's head and Kaidoh kissed him, swallowing his words, turning them into a lengthy, pleased hum. When Kaidoh let him up for air, Inui panted for a few breaths and then swallowed. "You have a lot of faith in me."
"All anyone has to do is know you to have faith in you," Kaidoh said, smiling slightly at Inui's glazed expression. "They'll see what I see. You'll find your place again. It just needs time."
With a fond caress, Kaidoh disentangled himself from Inui, picked up his tennis bag, and left their apartment. Inui sat for a moment, staring at the door after it closed, and then turned back to the newspaper. "You are incorrect, Kaidoh. I have found my place. It's just a shame I cannot make money loving you."
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(Now if this were BL manga, Inui would actually be almost out of money and have to resort to selling his body on the street without Kaidoh knowing. And the first guy to pick him up would be Renji.)
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Our company merged with another last Monday. Total shocker. That Monday was incredibly subdued and the subsequent two weeks have been very emotional.
But the good news is, I started a new job today, as I had had a few interviews the week before the announcement.
Anyway, what I'm saying is, change can be for the good. Good luck. :)
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And I agree, it could be a good chance for me.
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But I bet you anything your next job will be Super Fantastiche.
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Lemme just tell you that it can't be any less fun than trying to get certified to teach in PA. Cause PA is freaking insane.
I have no inui/kaidoh handy, but have a cookie:
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"See ya!" Kazuhiro gives Kobayashi a last smirk and a little wave with his fingers, then saunters off down the hall, leaving Kobayashi staring after him with a dangling jaw and a body humming from the drive-by groping. He looks down at his hands and tosses the crumpled flier for the Go club aside with a sneer.
"Aw, he likes you!" Misaki says, appearing at Kobayashi's side to hand him the last few of his papers.
"What the hell are you talking about?" Kobayashi scowls down at the first page of his essay, which now has a big sneakerprint on it.
"You know," Misaki waves a hand as they start down the hall to their class, Kobayashi glancing from side to side in case of further assault, "like in elementary school, when you yank on a girl's pigtails to get her attention."
"That how you got that?" Kobayashi looks pointedly at the bruise across Misaki's cheekbone. "Tachiki yanking your pigtails?"
"Shut up." Misaki makes a face and pushes Kobayashi into the classroom.
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Do you think Kintaro will pull Sakuno's pigtails?
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I hope he does, cause then Ryoma can say "see, i told you they were too long."
...and I didn't just think about Kintaro/Sakuno/Ryoma. Seriously. *thinks about Katsuo/Arai*
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*hugs* good luck! :>
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*would write if my brain hadn't burned out weeks ago* x_x I'm hoping it'll revive after finals.
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