Penknife ([identity profile] penknife.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] prillalar 2004-02-14 07:57 pm (UTC)

*dies laughing*

So right. So wrong.

To Angrily Bite

Charles and Erik were celebrating a metallic Valentine's Day together. Charles had cooked a beautiful dinner and they ate in a secret lair by candlelight.

"My darling," Erik said, stroking Charles's hand, "I have something for you." He gave a box to Charles. "It is but a strange token of my shiny love."

Charles opened the box. Inside was a mutant fork! He gazed at it hopefully. Then he gazed at Erik hopefully. "It's painful," Charles said. "Come here and let me bite you."

Just then, a violent crone sprang out of hiding and cackled like gathering storm clouds providing a sense of impending doom. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in an impressive voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.

Erik read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my brother."

They stared at each other regretfully as the crone cackled some more. Charles's shoulder began to tremble. Then Erik shrugged, pulled out a costume, and hit the crone on her neck. She fell over dead.

"Problem solved!" Charles said and kissed Erik broodily. "This is a curious Valentine's Day!"

They sharply burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.

And then they bit each other all night long.

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